Society as a network, not a community


This is part 2 in my opinion series that I wanted to give a title like “Society sucks”, or “what I think is wrong with the world today” etc.
Mostly these posts are based on my observations of the world around me.  It started as one big long post – but now is being broken into a trilogy (even though I have the idea for a part 4 now).
Part 1 is available HERE


As life changes, I think I have figured out why society is going down the tubes.
My current neighbourhood is the prime example.  Everyone mostly ignores each other…. Why has that changed over the years?   I have a theory or 2.

Years ago, there wasn’t as many distractions for families and people.
Put this into perspective – take away social media, connectivity with the entire world and look at life 25 or more years ago.
You didn’t make many calls – nobody had unlimited long distance.
TV was 2-13 channels, but they told us cable/satellite was going to be the next big thing.
Your social interaction was your community around you – so you got to know your community around you, and were part of it.

Todays social interaction is 200+ texts/IMs/DMs/tweets/posts/calls/snaps etc with people you don’t even know half the time.

In communities, years ago – where you knew all your neighbours, if you decided that the person wasn’t driving fast enough and drove on the sidewalk to pass them  – you probably knew them, and witnesses would know it was you being a complete asshat.
Today, We see the bad aggressive driving everywhere, and nobody cares – as nobody from their community or honour group is going to tell them that they were being an asshat.  So, nobody whose opinion matters, will be impacted.

Which is why people can be the way they are… no consequences. (this might be a bit of a rabbit hole).
They can park in front of the grocery store in the no parking zone and walk inside – because nobody they know will see them, and the store won’t do anything about it.
Full cart in the express lane – who cares, not the lady in front of me in the express lane with a $300 grocery order.  I wanted to leave the 1 item I had and just walk out – but I needed that loaf of bread.

Back to bad drivers –
They can cut you off in traffic, not give you the right of way in a merge – and then finger you for beeping your horn.  Why – no consequences.
You don’t know who they are and you aren’t going to see them at work, diner, club meeting, or gas station, to tell them that they are being a shithead…. So there are no consequences.  They don’t know you and don’t care.
There is no community accountability for people to be recognized as the douchebags.

I think back many years ago, Victoria BC, and I am being pulled over while driving my wife’s car.  The police officer recognized her car and it wasn’t her driving at 9 pm. They knew her as the volunteer at the local elementary school.  They didn’t know me as I was away a lot back then.  I wasn’t speeding or anything – but they didn’t expect to see her car out that late and investigated.   I thought that was great that they could keep an eye out to that level.
Think that it happens today?

Here is one that really shows how far society has fallen.
When you see an accident – how many people stop?  I can tell you when my wife got hit a couple of years ago – NOBODY.  When my buddy Rob crashed his motorcycle – I was in the ditch of a secondary highway trying to do first aid and hold the phone with my shoulder calling 911, and 4 different vehicles that went by down a country road didn’t stop before the ambulance arrived.
That pissed me off – what if that were a member of your family?  Would you want someone to help them?  But, society doesn’t care because the odds are that it doesn’t impact them.  There are no consequences or accountability to their actions.

That is the big attraction of social media – connecting people around the world.  I keep in touch with more of my friends from around the world now, because I can.  In theory, do I need friends in my subdivision, as I have all these online friends……….?
But would those friends see your driving, behaviour, antics, and asshattery. No – they don’t.  So, who is the one to tell you that you are being “that jerk”?  unfortunately the person who does that, is just considered a bigger jerk, so the message gets ignored.  Why – people don’t care about the opinions of others anymore.

In many interactions, so many of which are on YouTube, the issues of road rage become – who yells louder.  I have stories from friends, where someone hits them by running a stop sign, and immediately tries to become intimidating, threatening, and making comments like “I have a police friend” or something else to intimidate you into backing down.
LOUD DOES NOT MAKE PEOPLE RIGHT.
Back to the person, who was wrong, yelling everything they can in order to be intimidating.  Key note – my police friends, if I ever called them to back me up with their badge when I was wrong, would kick my ass.  That is the level of accountability I expect from people I call my friends.

But there is no longer accountability in society today.  I think I could do a series of blog posts on the justice system and all the issues people have there – but, maybe another year.  Personal accountability is as dead as common sense.

Back to the point of the topic –
As a military member, I move around a lot.  With the unit that I then belong to, I have a work group, and living off base I try to meet people in the community around me.
We volunteer, we did things with our kids which gave us friends.  We met our neighbours, enjoyed being regulars at a neighbourhood pub in more than 1 community.
I don’t see any pride in that level of behaviour from most of society anymore.

That is what makes me sad about the future of society.
Maybe this is just a local phenomenon, but I am starting to doubt it.


Thanks for following along so far.
Part 3 is available HERE, and as mentioned previously – part 4 is being drafted now.

Here are some of the resources that made me go …. hmmmm.
Art of Manliness podcast
Local military spouse blogger – Kim

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